From boring to golden

Internet memes are a simple form of entertainment continuing to deliver for hours on end. However, there is one a mega meme almost always overlooked: The Google Doodle.

Google Doodles first originated in the late 90s when the founders of Google decided to commemorate their attendance of the Burning Man Festival (Which baffles me because who wants to celebrate their lack of hygiene for a month?) Since its inception, the doodles have enlighten millions of people. In recent years, they have begun marketing certain doodles to distinctive countries. Sure, the first doodles where dull and somewhat crude, but they had the characteristics of greatness that could come about from such an idea. Therefore, some of the more current doodles have even become interactive. The public can never really foretell what the clever nerdy geniuses at Google are stirring up for the next doodles.

Continuing, about a month ago there was a doodle for Pierre de Fermat (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!). Apparently, he had something to do with the conception of calculus, but really that is all I understood from the Wikipedia article. Don't tread on me, I'm an aspiring writer/editor/internet meme, so anything with numbers or symbols is usually out of my league. (Kind of like Emile Hirsh...SWOON) Nonetheless, here is the Google doodle for August 17,2011:



Furthermore, I have taken upon myself to go through the entire catalog of every single Google Doogle ever created and pick at the top five for your personal enjoyment. If at anytime you do not agree with this list, save your bitching.

5. December 23, 2010


Learning about other cultures is always fun.

4. March 20, 2009


Childhood nostalgia

3. January 28, 2009



Stare at it for a little bit.

2. June 9-10, 2011

http://www.google.com/logos/2011/lespaul.html

It's a guitar. You can record your greatest computer guitar song and share it with your friends. Awesome.

AND THE GREATEST GOOGLE DOODLE OF ALL TIME...(drum rollllllllllllllll)

1. May 21, 2010

Why?? Because Pacman is the shit and I am personally always looking for different ways to waste my time on the internet.

Honorable Mentions

January 4, 2006



August 30, 1998 (the world's first Google Doodle)



There you have it folks, the greatest Google Doodles to date.

Finally, this man needs no Google Doodle...PUTIN.

What's "cabs are here" in Italian??

Every generation as its selling points in pop culture. The pet rock, Barney the big purple dinosaur, Andy Warhol, etc. We all have our niche.

However, my parents lived in the golden age of television watching the likes of Johnny Carson, Lucille Ball and Bob Hope entertain the masses during the late night block. My generation is left with the ashes of Carson's cigarettes: the Jersey Shore. Please, don't get me wrong, I too enjoy witnessing the mess unfold on my screen, but how much is too much? When is it time to ring in the cash cow?

Here is the lowdown: The Jersey Shore is the brian child of MTV, a channel who's humble beginnings twenty years ago featured strictly music videos. Fast forward to present day, it's now opened towards a much more water down brand. The Shore features a group of twenty-somethings picked to live in a house and have their lives taped. Yes, the Jersey Shore is MTV's own homage to the Italian-American, but the already fragile generation should not be subjected to such dementia. (I have an aunt who is currently dealing with Alzheimer's, and let me tell you folks, it ain't pretty.)

Doesn't this sound all too familiar? Why, yes, good point. The Real World was MTV's first experiment with relatity telelvion, but how is differs is the changing of characters each seasons. The excitement continues, and the catharsis stays the same.

Let's look at the damage. The first season of the Jersey Shore had its qircks; the drunken brawls, the partying and hook-ups. Yadda yadda. Then the geniuses at the Music Television Network thought: "Hey, let's send these idiots somewhere else." Miami was clutch. Following, the second season preceded the first, however, with silly catchphrases that somehow leaked into the American lexicon. Next, the third season was a mess spiraling around the Atlantic coastline, ultimate trash. The two "star-crossed lovers" found themselves in the midst of heated battles over the same bloody thing. ROOOOOOONNNNNIIIIIIEEEEEE. Really, already three seasons of this?

The fourth season is now currently taking us across the pond to ITALY! YES, THE MOTHERLAND! With only one episode in I can already fore see a lot of complaining about how no one expect Vinny understands any of the language. Also, I see fights, lots of juice head fists pumping into each others heads. Is this getting old for only me? SNORE.

Remember children, you can't milk your fifteen minutes too long. (Spencer and Heidi Pratt who???)

God (or Putin), please, save my generation.

Anyways: the root my demise

Now, I do not claim to be a grammar guru, (actually, I was reading one of my past blog posts a couple of weeks ago and saw I used the word "dreamed" instead of "dreamt." Really, Gina? I need to go back to sixth grade.) however, the word "anyways" is not real, so stop using it, dumbasses. Unless you are willing to sound like a complete tool, it should be erase from your mind...OBLIVIATE!! "Anyways" is a mythical creature sent up by satan to annoy the hell out of me. Please, for the love of all that is sacred, do not use it. It makes YOU sound like a hobby horse and I am pretty sure there is only room in this world for one real life horse to the hobby, yours truly. SO BACK OFF.

Second, continuing the rant on pet peeves (merp). I hate when people who list their likes and dislikes generically so everyone who reads them can relate. Wowing the trolls of the interent with your cleverness and insight is actually not too terribly difficult. I actually hate generic things in general. (Cancel out generic brands from this equation because I am poor and they are delicious since they cost half as much as brand name equivalent, rage.) Generic is synonymous with boring. So, don't try to humor me with your prose if you list "writing" as one of your likes, especially when you have a blog. No shit, you like writing, you have a blog. I hate boring. This is why I spend my Friday nights updating my own blog. (lame.) I am also not claiming I am "better" than others, but I like to transpose the norm and make you think. (I am like the Christopher Nolan of blogging!!) new name?!?!

In the end, being creative is one thing, witty is another. Mix them together with a pinch of sass and voila!, you have an unemployed twenty-something who enjoys the cathartic feeling after a tornado warning.

save me from myself.

Hobby horse n Putin, OUT!

In Soviet Russia, peeves pet YOU!

Soaking up your heritage

Some people like to visit their relatives in their homeland to try and get in touch with their roots. In all honesty, my friends and I are not "some people" and sitting in a beer hall seemed like a better (and cheaper) adventure. Now, is there any a better way to soak up a person's German ancestry than to spend the night drinking away at a Americanized beer hall. Nope.

1 liter, 2 liter, 3 liter...floor

First, to clear up any confusion, I've actually been to Germany before (Berlin), but the forests of Bavaria still remain a mystery. So, on the lederhosen of my ancestors, I grabbed a liter in Cincinnati, well, Newport, Ky's, very own haus of bier.

Proof of my own German adventures...minus the oompa loompas

The Hofbrauhaus is everything I believe Bavarian Germany is like. The original opened in the 1590s and have been severing the likes of locals and tourists, mostly tourists, since then. Oh, and for all you history buffs our there, Hitler even enjoyed a few brews there once too.

The geniuses in Munich took the idea of large room, long tables, benches and liters of beer to the shores of the U.S of A. The first opened in across the Ohio River from the skyline of Cincinnati in 2003. Since then, the Germans' have been taking the country with a flood of delicious taking beer. And they definitely underestimated American's love of beer.

In the end, I thank you German ancestors for many things, but the Hofbrauhaus tops the list.

PROOST!

A six word memoir

"Vices are the secret to happiness." -Gina G.

Diary of a mad white woman

Have you ever heard a song that makes you automatically perk up? Mine is "Can't Hurry Love" by the great Diana Ross and the Supremes. It also was covered by Phil Collins in the 80s, but the original still reigns absolute. But, really, it's just a really fun song to dance around to.

A tune depicting a mother's less of telling her daughter to be patience in the game of love. However, in general, couldn't this be a telling of life? For there can be no greater lesson in realizing you need to see seek the simple things in life first, then gain the prize at the end. Actions, wether they be positive or negative, can be built on one another. Just keep swimming a little blue animated fish once said, but hey, it's good advice.

The song marks a step of maturity for the Supremes also, moving from the teeny-pop music and themes, into songs dealings will deeper themes and meanings. Therefore, it can also mark a step in one's own building of maturity into adulthood.

So are the lessons taught by your mother the most important? You betcha, so listen well.

"She said to trust, give it time

No matter how long it takes"

The likes and dislikes of a hobby horse

Name: Gina
Age: 22
occupation: professional resume e-mailer

likes: scratching, carving pumpkins, internet memes, the smell of libraries, spicy food (see below), beards, falling asleep on an airplane and waking up in a different time zone, high fives, sloe gin fizzes, the university of dayton, black coffee, shark week, matt lauer, learning and my mother's chicken casserole (well, casseroles in general).

dislikes: sitting for extended periods of time, standardized testing, when people don't follow me back on twitter (excluding celebrities), itches, stephanie meyer, eggplant and my cat.

goal: change the world
status: in-progress

BRING IT.

A little bit of spice makes everything nice

I claim to be an aficionado of many things, including, but not exclusive to, beards, The Office (US series), the crust around your eyes after waking up, Tiny Fey, etc. However, one such expertise I have accumulated over time is that of spice, spicy foods. I am an avid consumer of spice, spice and more spice. I won't say I take it to the extreme, but the added heats illuminates the flavors. yum, yummer, yummies. Actually, a few days ago, after a night out in lovely Ada, Ohio, my friend, Matt, and I made buffalo chicken nuggets topped with Sriracha Sauce. So hot, but oh so delicious. Chili sauce, chili sauce, you are my weakness. What does it go great on? Everything. Potato chips, sandwiches and, according to the bottle, even pasta. I have yet to take it that far, but who knows where my obsession will take me.

Continuing, according to the Christian Science Monitor, India added the world's hottest chili pepper, the bhut jolokia or the "ghost chili," as a play in the battle against terrorism. I guess that the only real way to beat pesky terrorist, you got to be creative. I mean, Obama did manage to catch Osama (after only nine and a half years), but the war is not over. Watch out Al-Qaeda, they are going to be making your food extra spicy. All joke aside, the pepper is planned to be used in making tear gas and other forms of chemical warfare. Wow, that is one hot peppa!People are claiming this weapon of chose should be deemed "unfair." But, come on people, we gotta take "them" form all sides. In the end, spices are here not only for our taste buds, but for our well-being too.

Hide yo kids, hide yo eyes.

Oh, the wonders of the chili pepper. My roommates, I mean, parents, allege my asshole is going to fall off from the excess amount of chili sauce I am consuming, but we will just have to wait and see. I will keep you posted (because, isn't everyone interested in my bowel movements as much as myself?) T.M.I.? DON'T CARE. You're the one reading this.

Last, but not least, Putin Pic (Apparently, I made a similar expression during commencement when they showed my jowel on the jumbo tron):

Looking Past the Porch

I'm back and ready for more. Two weeks ago I graduated from the University of Dayton. I received my diploma along with about 1,400 of my peers. It was, in a sense, the worst day of my life, but there is nothing but up from here. Afterwards, I traveled down to Florida for five days of udder debauchery. I survived, almost, with only a sprained left foot to show for my trip. But, it was the greatest end to my four year adventure.

Furthermore, I changed the name of this venture for the significance of admiring my accomplishments on the UD campus and looking forward into the future. However, I plan on looking at this life day-by-day and focusing on what I am doing now. As for now, I am stuck in beautiful, scenic Bath, Ohio, but plan on making moves, big moves. I will continue this...get excited.

When I grow up

What did you dream of being when you were merely 7-years-old?

In elementary school, I dreamt of being a teacher. My first grade teacher's name was Mrs. Tasker. I wanted to be just like her. I wanted to teach phonics, basic arthritic and science. I wished to be a tall as her, as kind and thoughtful while still holding true to the fundamentals of student learning. I felt the majority of my peers were inspired by their own teachers. Teachers are the first adults children spend more time with other than their parents. They are not there to replace them, but to act as a support system for learning and social needs. I discovered the need to continue this sector of American life within my very own American Dream at the ripe age of seven, however there was no way to know where I was going to end up later.

Continuing, the majority of school aged children aspire for careers in teaching, nursing, firefighting, etc. because those are the people who they look up to. There are the one's who are there to help and to create focus. They keep people feeling safe and secure. Security goes missing the moment one leaves the womb. A person then is exposed to the elements until they are sent six feet under.

Currently, I strive to become...a writer? Yeah, I'm a crazy in the sense even questioning my own goals. My grip of the English language remains weary and my sense of self dwindles. Thoughts continuously running through my mind lend me little sanctuary for answer if this is real. The truth is, I love telling people about things. I love telling stories. I can't successfully say I am a good storyteller, but I like to keep people as well as myself informed. I want to be in the middle of the world, talking and really trying to discover what makes humans tick. Who are we? Why are we here? What are the reasons for the problems in the world?

Dreams? Since the first time I watched Almost Famous, I've wanted to write for Rolling Stone Magazine. However, that is what I would like to refer to as "reaching for the stars," but goals are what make humans succeed. Recently, I am striving to work towards the greater good. I want to go an be in the middle of what is happening in the world. Take me there, soon.

Right now, I'm just procrastinating on an article I have to write, but I really am so confused writing down these thoughts helps me organize.

By the way, currently on a HUGE Mumford and Sons kick. Why have I never heard of these fellows before? GREATNESS.

Four years too short

Starting this back up again. There are so many thing to do, with so little time. There needs to be time for reflection. The angle, the goal for this remains a mystery. I feel like this venture will help continue a persuit of...the unknown. I really don't know what I am striving for at this moment, but I am positive I will find the answers soon. I am about a month before limbo starts. The alternate reality that it is no longer socially acceptable to drink excessive amounts of booze to forget the rest of the world. Tragic, I know, but not the end of the world. There are different things to focus on. Like, what kind of job to I want? Where do I want to work? Is this the right path for me? Should I go to grad school? Do I want to make my parents happy? or just me?

My own self identity is slipping. Last night, I finished reading "Mother Night" by Kurt Vonnegut and related the entire time to the protagonist, Howard W. Campbell. Not in the whole being an American spy aspect, but all of a sudden finding oneself is a perpetual state of nothingness, purgatory.

I don't know what I want or where to go to even find where my Starting in May, my own purgatory will be the glorious Akron, Ohio. (Uh, Akron just got a shout out on the Sonic commercial in between segments of the Kardashian sister whinning, which is ironic because we don't have Sonics there...SWENSON'S!) Anyway, I don't know what will happen after those first three months, but I have a suspicion that the answers will find me, hopefully soon.

I secretly wish I was still 18, wide eyed and innocent. Not know what I want, but still having the answers within the walls of this institution. UD is letting me go, but it will forever be mine.

Real Life Lessons

I found this on my old, old, old xanga.com blog from high school.

"How to be cool.
By: Tre Cool

Trying to be cool is not that cool.
Everyone should have their own style. Yesterday we were on a plan from Berlin and there were 25 hair models all coming back from some hair convention. They were trying to out-cool each other so much. They were wearing weird clothes, it looked like every single thing they were wearing was thrift store items. It was like everything had a story. That was pretty cool, but trying to out-cool people is not cool. You've got to just let it course through your veins.

Hair made the man/woman.
Cutting your own hair is really cool. I've had disasters, but it's always grown back. The extra inch is cool. You know, when you cut the hair at the top of your dick really short, so when you're standing naked you dick looks longer? That's a top tip for the gents.

Respect the cock!
Condoms are very cool, because they allow you to have sex without getting diseases. And children, which is kind of like a disease because it makes you throw up in the morning and then it turns you into a parent. Sex toys are cool, too. Dildos and whatnot. Wow, Tre's guide to cool is getting good.

Don't wear sunglasses indoors without a very good excuse.
I think it's a little weird unless you're just been in a 12-round boxing match. And even then, met me check out the shiner, dude.

Only get into fights you can win.
It's best to either just walk away or make sure you can win it. It depends on how important it is. If it doesn't really matter fuck all at the end of it forget it, but if it has something to do with my band or my family then it's cool as long as I make sure I win. I almost got my ass kicked the other day. I know it's a little homoerotic, but I've been wrestling people bigger than me on the tour, and once they start kicking my ass I start cheating. Cheating's not cool. Wresting's not cool either. It hurts.

Build up your alcohol tolerance.
Being able to drink more than your friends and being the last one standing is cool. But don't drink and dial. It's better to text when you're wasted. Texting is cool.

If you're not blessed with natural cool, work with what you've got.
Embrace your geekiness - own it, make it yours."

I hope you kids were taking notes!!

PUTIN GIVING A RASPBERRY ON THE BELLY OF A CHILD, NORMAL: